When a young man is ready to marry, he wants everything to be right, especially the relationship between his mom and his bride-to-be. Most young men are apprehensive if they sense any tension between the 2 important women in their lives. That’s exactly how Joe felt.
As an only son, his case seemed more sensitive. His mother had kept him by her side most of his childhood and teenage years. All Joe really wants now is that his bride-to-be, Lisa, can manage the strong bond between him and his mom, but he didn’t know if she could. And it’s kind of unfair to pressure her into it.
Joe needed guidance. What would be the best strategy to bring these 2 women together? God led Joe to TWGO where he got an answer of peace.
When mothers worry about their son getting married it is because they’re afraid of losing their son’s love, attention and commitment. Mothers tend to share strong bonds with their sons, more so if they have only one son. Such fear, is most times taken away if the bride-to-be makes added effort to accommodate and accept the mother-in-law to be, as she would her own mom. She would need to lavish her with love, gifts and attention, without necessarily putting too much pressure on herself. These actions are important because they assure the older woman that her son won’t be lost, rather she can gain another love …from her daughter-in-law.
Joe encouraged Lisa to go the extra mile to accommodate his mom a bit. Thankfully, this strategy worked for them. A few months later, Joe and Lisa were successfully married. Joe’s testimonies and joy have been awesome. His mom and his fiancee, now wife, have become best friends to the point that they sometimes forget Joe is around the house as they indulge in their ‘womanly gists’ His mom also gave his wife a special pet name.
Praise God!
Sometimes mothers refuse to accept that their sons would become closely bonded to another woman. So they consciously or subconsciously struggle with letting go. At other times, a mother may be genuinely concerned about the kind of woman her son is trying to bond with. Whatever the case, it’s helpful when both mother-inlaw to be and wife-to be are aware of the possible impact a decision to tie the knots can have on the emotional and psychological wellbeing of a mom, especially when her son is an only child or an only son. Where there’s a sincere desire for peace and harmony, this awareness will help those involved to make little adjustments to accommodate one another.
First published on ‘Grace Obomanu Blog’ on 11/12/2018.