Thank you Eric {original name withheld} for writing us at Talk With Grace Obomanu
As always, your question spurred us to search the scriptures a bit more to provide you and others who may be asking similar question a balanced view on the subject.
You wrote us saying that you don’t know why God has refused to respond to a particular request you made of Him which has lingered for many years now.
Well, let us begin by establishing that God has provided for all we need for godliness and a good life as we find in 2 Peter 1:3;
“For His divine power has bestowed on us {absolutely} everything necessary for {a dynamic spiritual} life and godliness, through true and personal knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. For by these He has bestowed on us His precious promises {of inexpressible value}….” Amplified Version.
However, to help us answer your question, we’ll systematically provide answers to 4 key questions. We trust that by providing answers to these questions from the Bible, we’ll all become more enlightened and illuminated.
Question 1: Does God always hear us and respond when we pray?
My answer to this question is; ‘Yes, God always hears us and responds when we pray’.
Let’s start by considering this dialogue between a father and his son….
Son: Please Dad, can I make a request?
Father: Yes please
Son: Please can I have a candy bar?
Now, this father’s response for a candy can be a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’.
If ‘yes’, the son gets a candy bar. But if ‘no’ the child gets nothing.
But in both instances, the father gave a response!
Naturally, we tend to appreciate and welcome a ‘yes’ response. As a parent, I can think of 10 reasons why a candy bar may not be best at a certain time.
Somebody says; ‘Hey, Grace, God only responds to faith’. And I ask; ‘did you pray a faithless prayer?’
Jesus Christ told us in John 14:14;
“If you ask anything in My name, I will do it.” NKJV
This is a strong assurance from Jesus! And He says, ‘ask anything in my name and I will do it?
Personally, I can count on both fingers (and toes) things I have asked from God ‘in faith’ and ‘in the name of Jesus’ and haven’t experienced yet. You can say, ‘delay is not denial’ true, but ‘delay can very well be denial with God’ for reasons we’ll discuss below. But if anyone tells you he/she always gets a ‘yes’ response from the Father, the person is not telling you the whole truth.
God cannot lie, He means what He says and says what he means. So, every Believer in Christ Jesus must become confident of 1 John 5:15 and 1 John 5:14;
“Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us, and if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him.” 1 John 5:14-15. NKJV
God hears us always and He always gives a response. His response can be a ‘yes’ ‘no’ or ‘not now’. His quietness is a response which we can explore with Him if interested.
Question 2: Does God give us everything we ask for?
My answer here is a ‘NO’.
No good earthly parent does that else you end up with a stunted child.
Let’s look at an interesting example of someone in the Bible that asked the Father for a thing and didn’t get it.
Jesus Christ:
Being overwhelmed by the thoughts of the pains and sufferings of the cross, Master Jesus Christ agonized through a whole night asking the Father to take away the horror that awaited Him at the cross.
“And He said, “Abba Father, all things are possible for You. Take this cup away from Me; nevertheless, not what I will, but what You will.” Mark 14:36. NKJV
You know, Mark 14:36 really does seem like a very spiritual prayer offered by Jesus. But is it?
Matthew 26:37-38 gives a clearer picture of a distressed, anxious, sorrowful, and deeply troubled Jesus.
“….and He began to be sorrowful and deeply distressed. Then He said to them, ‘My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch with Me.” NKJV
Jesus was not only troubled and anxious, he also seemed to momentarily forget the ‘will’ of the Father when he added the ‘spiritual’ addendum of ‘nevertheless, not what I will, but what You will.”
I mean nobody knew the ‘will’ of the Father like Jesus! Jesus shared the Father’s Will with the disciples;
“And this is the will of Him who sent Me, that everyone who sees the Son and believes in Him may have everlasting life…” John6:40. NKJV.
Jesus left Heaven willingly and voluntarily to fulfil this ‘will’ as we find in John 6:38;
“For I have come down from Heaven, not to do My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me.” NKJV
So, as we clearly see, Jesus’ prayer in Matthew 26:37-38 was an ‘emotional prayer’ which we all pray sometimes. Emotional prayers are not faith-based prayers. Emotional prayers are many times selfish prayers. Emotional prayers attempt to blackmail God, but sadly and unfortunately, they don’t catch the father’s attention. And this takes us to the 3rd question….
Question 3: Why would God say ‘no’ sometimes?
This question is very important for me because it helps settle the fact that God has the ability and is willing to provide us with every good thing that pertains to life and godliness. That point needs to be made because God made us for a purpose and He is constantly, daily, and always causing things around us to work together for our good as to fit into His plan. I believe that for myself .
So when God says ‘no’, it may be that;
- My request is not in line with His will for my life and may therefore distract from His plan and purpose.
- A denial of my request would not ultimately disrupt my primary mission on earth.
Again, we look at one of our opening scriptures;
“Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us, and if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him.” 1 John 5:14-15. NKJV
Many times, we don’t observe the caveat in that scripture.
We will not receive the answers to our requests and petitions if we ask outside of God’s will. It has to be according to His will.
Like we saw earlier, Jesus Christ, knew the will of the Father, but like happens to many of us in our broken states, he made a request that would never get a ‘yes’ response. The salvation of mankind was superior and more important than the temporary pain and discomfort Christ felt.
Apostle Paul certainly knew what a ‘no’ from the Father felt like. He lived with ‘a thorn’ in his flesh despite pleading with God 3 times to remove the thorns (2 Corinthians 12:7-9).
Notice God’s response to Paul;
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”
Question: What does Paul need ‘grace’ for?, ….to bear the thorns?
I think not.
God gave Paul an assurance of the availability of His GRACE and STRENGTH to accomplish his mission on earth. Nowhere in the Bible do we read that Paul couldn’t wake up one morning to reach out to the Gentiles because of the thorns in his flesh.
Our desires for a new job, new home, life partner, children, etc, are all good and awesome. They’ll probably help us feel we’re having a good life. But what does the Father want for us? What is His focus?
When God says an ‘outright no’ by not giving us the things we ask for or when we ask for them, we must learn to trust that His ‘no’ must be ultimately for our good or the good of mankind.
Question 4: Is it possible to always get a ‘yes’ response from God?
YES! ….When we pray according to His will.
Romans 8:26 tells us how to achieve that;
“…for we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. Now, He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Sprit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God.” NKJV
We are able to pray according to the WILL of God when we let the Holy Spirit make intercessions for us. And this way, we can always be confident that we will receive the answers for our request.
Again, when we spend time with God in His Word, we get to know His will and the likelihood of asking for the wrong things is gone, then we ask according to His Will and we get what we ask for.
“If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you.”
John 15:7 NKJV
Praise God!
I will not end this article without emphasizing the place of patient endurance in our dealing with God. Patience is a virtue we must all crave as Christians. Since we know that God hears us always when we pray according to His will and because we are confident that His plan is to bring to give us a hope and an expected end, after we pray in the spirit and according to His will, we must stay expectant, trusting in His Ability, Willingness and Faithfulness.
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